Tag: featured

Joy and Peace

Published on by katiesencouragementforyou4 Comments

After I had my third child–Sean James, I experienced postpartum depression.  It was bad. 

I remember going to a woman’s gathering, and telling my best friend, (Becki Crain), how depressed I was.  Our conversation was overheard by another woman, who proceeded to tell me that if I trusted in Jesus, I would not be depressed.  My countenance fell, sorrow filled my soul.  My friend Becki had compassion in her eyes as she looked at me, and then turned to the other woman and said, “One thing doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with the other.”

I relate that story because it has not been my first time, and it probably won’t be my last time, of being judged by other people, and somehow feeling diminished in the process.  My first response to this judgement is to want to defend myself.  They don’t understand.  Perhaps I could make them understand.  Perhaps if they understood and agreed with me, I would somehow feel restored.

My second reaction is to try to avoid such people and such encounters in the future.  Certainly, after my son Sean died–I did isolate myself.  My wounds were too great to have others inadvertently touching them with their clumsy words and possible judgements.  When I did experience judgements and corrections—my response was to lash out in anger.

Awhile back, I experienced a situation where I felt judged and misunderstood.  I felt very vulnerable.   I walked away from that time, so angry with God.  How could He not protect me?  How could He have allowed me to be so hurt?  Then I turned the anger on myself.  How could I have put myself in a situation where I would be so vulnerable?

For the past four years, I’ve been going to Celebrate Recovery.  Everyone there is dealing with hurts, habits and hang-ups of some sort or another.  When we meet in small groups, we start each group by reading through a list of guidelines –things like we aren’t there to fix each other, rather, to listen to each other, and so after each person takes 3 to 5 minutes to talk about their own recovery–no one says anything to fix them.  I must tell you—this is glorious!!  It definitely gives me a feeling of being safe, heard and understood. (I highly recommend a group like this.)

So—how did I process the previous situation?  Well, like God used my friend Becki to comfort me, and correct the other woman, God used another Becky to give me a book, which I read, which greatly comforted me.  But mostly, God showed up.  Once again, I saw that God is near to the brokenhearted.  God, Himself, comforted me.  He reminded me that my value and significance was not found in anyone or anything but Him.  Others may have legitimate things to say to me—even though they may hurt me at the time– however, everything they say must be brought to the feet of Jesus to see if it is legitimate, and to act on it, if so.   

I was able, after that time with the Lord, to speak with each of the people who had spoken to me, not in anger, but in love and forgiveness.  I knew this was the gift of the Holy Spirit to me.  This was the work of God in my life.   Going through this experience has helped me see that I don’t need to avoid people for fear of being hurt by them.  People are not my God.  God is my God, and His love is never failing.  His will is to give me His Joy and Peace—which surpasses all understanding.

May We Be Encouraged!

Does God Still Heal?

Published on by katiesencouragementforyou22 Comments

Does God still heal?  Of course He does.  I have been a recipient of His healing powers, as has my family, many times.  God healed my eyesight.  I detail that story in:  Yes, Jesus loves me.

My mother was healed from her cancer.  My husband has many injuries that should have prevented him from doing the highly physical work that he did, but God has healed him time and time again, so he was able to continue to do this work.

Does God heal everyone all the time?  No, He does not.  Does that mean that God has favorites–that He loves some of us, more than He loves others of us?  No, it does not—God is impartial  (Galatians 2:6; Romans 10:12)—He loves us all.

Then why does God heal?  Some say–if you have enough faith, you can be healed.  If you believe enough, you can be healed.  Then where does that leave the people, who were believing with everything they had, and they were not healed?  Where does that leave the people whom God said, “No” to their healing here on this earth?

It leaves them where it leaves the people that He does heal—LOVED.   They are loved.

Romans 8:38     And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. 

So what about the question, “if you have enough faith, you’ll be healed?”…

 My son Sean was not healed, no matter how much faith we had.   In fact, we didn’t need very much faith, as Jesus Himself taught that if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you can move mountains. (Matthew 17:20) That’s because God is moving the mountain, not us, not the amount of our faith–it is the object of our faith, the Lord God, that moves the mountain.

When God hasn’t moved the mountains for me, and hasn’t healed, and hasn’t done what I’ve asked, I can start to wonder if He’s angry with me.  Is He withholding His blessing from me for a reason?  Why hasn’t He answered?   Why am I suffering, or why is a loved one suffering?

I’ve recently heard a song called, Remind Me You’re Here.   There is a line in the song that says: “I won’t ask you for reasons, because the reasons won’t wipe away tears.”   The gist of this song is that the reasons behind the suffering won’t comfort us–but God will.  He will comfort us while we are suffering–even if our suffering was brought about because of our own wrongdoing–God will comfort us, and love us and restore us.

We don’t have to be afraid of God.  We don’t have to keep our distance from God.  He loves us. He has demonstrated that love, by sending Jesus to die for us.  

One day, all our suffering will be over, but until then we can know, we are loved with an everlasting love and a personal love–that wipes away every tear.

May We  be encouraged! 

“Remind Me You’re Here”

None of my pain
Has ever caught You by surprise
Still, it’s hard to trust You
When I’m lost in the wondering why
But I’ll trade every question
Just to lay down and rest in Your heart
And I’ll reach for Your hand
Though You led me here into the dark

And I won’t ask You for reasons
‘Cause a reason can’t wipe away tears
No, I don’t need all the answers
Just be here beside me
Father, remind me You’re here
Here

If it’s random or providence
Neither are a comfort to me
Are You cruel if You planned it,
Or weak if You allowed it to be?
Half of me’s still believin’
The other half is angry and confused
Oh, but all of me is desperate
And longing to be held by You

So I won’t ask You for reasons
‘Cause a reason can’t wipe away tears
No, I don’t need all the answers
Just be here beside me
Father, remind me You’re here
Here

Get me outta my mind
And into Your arms
Where hope comes alive
And fear falls apart

I won’t ask You for reasons
‘Cause a reason can’t wipe away tears
No, I don’t need all the answers
Just be here beside me
Come be here beside me

And I won’t ask You for reasons
‘Cause a reason can’t wipe away tears
No, I don’t need all the answers
Just be here beside me
Father, remind me You’re here
Here, just need to know
That You’re here, yeah
Here, I just need to know that You’re here

The Ravages of Time and Eternity

Published on by katiesencouragementforyou8 Comments

When I was young, my uncle used to take movies of us–and he put them on a reel to reel.  I’m not even sure where the movies are now–perhaps they are lost in the ravages of time.  I’m trying to preserve my memories–through using the latest technology to transfer photos and videos—to the digital world and save them for the next generation. 

However, much of our history gets lost to the ravages of time.  I remember my chemistry teacher telling me that if things are not taken care of they will decay at a very fast rate.  They will still decay, even if they are taken care of–just at a slower rate.

When I was a young bride, my husband’s family took a trip to Canada to visit family.  As part of our trip, we went to an old town that my husband’s grandfather had lived in growing up–except no one lived there anymore, and the town had reverted to dust.  There were a few stone foundations left standing–but the town and its structures had literally disappeared.  It was very eerie.  

What is my point?  My point is that everything eventually will decay and disappear.   

This is a really good reminder for me.  It helps me to really look at what is important in life.

Ultimately–the “things” will not last.   But God–He is eternal, and He has given me and you and all of us– eternal souls.   We will last beyond the ravages of time.   

God has placed eternity in our hearts. That is quite a thought isn’t it–God has placed eternity in our hearts. No wonder we aren’t satsified and keep wanting more. We want eternity. We want the Eternal One, and the Eternal One wants us. The Eternal One gave everything He had to make us His own, to kill the sin nature that lives inside of each of us, and bring to life the Eternal soul that rests within each of us. Our God wants to be One with us, and wants us to be One with each other.

He came to earth to show us how He is a God who wants to serve us, to love us. He wants us to turn around and love and serve each other. He put eternity in our hearts.

So Let Us Be Encouraged!!

Real life vs. dream life

Published on by katiesencouragementforyou19 Comments

What do you do when reality does not meet your dreams?  When I was young, I used to dream of being loved and married to a very romantic person. I think many of my dreams were formed by reading romance books and watching romantic movies.

As a single person in my late twenties, I would often chat with friends about what my husband would be like.  He, (this mythical creature), would tell me how wonderful I was, and fill my life with his poetry and prose.  My friends would laugh at me, and tell me they couldn’t wait to meet this amazing specimen of a human being.  (Just so you have a picture in your mind of who I was picturing—I grew up in the time of Star Wars–and I would have chosen a Luke over a Hans Solo—every time.)

Then I met Rich, my husband.  He was definitely a Hans Solo type of guy—not a Luke.  When we first met, I immediately assessed that he was not my type. However, I thought we would be good friends.   But then, he kept serving me, and showing me through his acts of kindness—that maybe he was my type after all.   Plus, children loved him, babies loved him—and I found that wildly attractive.

My husband and I were on staff with a Christian organization, and our friends were spread across the country and the world.  However, every two years we would meet in Colorado for staff training for a few weeks. 

Staff training was taking place 3 weeks before our wedding.  Many of my friends would be meeting Rich for the first time.  One of my roommates for that staff training was a sweet, gentle soul from Hawaii.  (She and I had shared an adventure in New York City together–click here for that story. 🙂 )

After meeting my husband she looked at me rather mischeviously–and asked if Rich was as romantic as I had hoped for.  (I think she could tell he was definitely a Hans Solo kind of guy.)

“No”, I answered, “but he has other really great qualities.”

That week, my friend got to see those really great qualities in action, as I got the stomach flu.  Suddenly, my hero sprang into action, and took care of me, bringing me trays from the cafeteria–filled with food that I could eat—like jello, broth, ginger ale, and crackers.   He did not care if he would get sick himself–he just demonstrated his love through his acts of service.  I remember my friend telling me, “Wow, Rich really loves you. I wasn’t so sure about him, until I saw the way he treated you, and served you. He really is your Prince.”

This past week, I’ve been sick again, (as have my daughters), once again, my hero sprang into action, taking care of all of us, demonstrating his love, time and time again.

Why do I tell this story?  I think many of us have similar stories.  We expect and desire love to come in a certain form.  Words mean a great deal to me–so I look for love through words.  Sometimes, I can be looking for love in one way, so much that I miss seeing it, in the way it is being offered.  My “dream” is a cloud that can be blown away, but my reality—it is rock solid land–that can be stood upon, and depended on.   The land is not smooth, it is rough to walk upon at times–but it is a good land—a gift from a good, good Father—-who often gives us gifts we really need, not just what we think we need.

So as we enter into this New Year, let us be thankful to the God who sees us and hears us and answers us, and let us BE ENCOURAGED!!

This Christmas all my children and grandchildren were with me and my husband.  When I say all–I also mean my son Sean, who died 12 years ago in September of 2013.  

I’ve experienced this phenomenon before– where Sean’s presence is so strong at Christmas. I can hear his voice in my ear.  I sense him all around the house.  I’ve talked with others who have said goodbye to their loved ones, and they have had similar experiences.  However, others have not had these experiences.   I don’t know what it means.  I have just been grateful to have had the experience.

On Christmas, as I was hugging my 3 year old granddaughter, she said out of the blue, “Uncle Sean”.  I started crying in earnest.  Later I told my granddaughter how glad I was that she said her Uncle Sean’s name, and that was a great gift to me to hear his name.

I have never really wanted to discuss these experiences too much, because we live in a culture where things have to be seen and touched and measured—for them to be real.

However, scripture tells us that we are living souls—that there is a part of each of us that cannot be seen or touched or measured—yet it is the realest and most alive part of each of us.

This is the season we celebrate God’s great gift to all of us–the gift of eternal life, the gift of forgiveness, the gift of a relationship with Him.   He is the One in whom we live and have our being—the One who surrounds us and from where there is nowhere that we cannot go. This God  gives breath to each of us.  This God,emptied Himself, and became human and dwelt among us.  This God is reconciling the world to Himself.    

For some reason, this God allowed me to experience the presence of my son. Perhaps as a reminder that when we die, we still live on, and we will see each other again.  We will be with each other, through all of eternity.  Death will not win.  Evil will not win. Love will triumph.  Love will never fail. God will have the last Word. 

May these thoughts bring peace to you, if you are grieving.  May these thoughts bring hope to you if you are hopeless.  May these thoughts bring you courage—if you need courage.  May these thoughts bring love to you—for you are loved—with an everlasting love!! 

May we be encouraged!!

Are you having a “Gift of the Magi” Christmas?

Published on by katiesencouragementforyou7 Comments

Are you having a “Gift of the Magi” Christmas?  I love the story of the Gift of the Magi–where the wife sells her long hair to buy her husband a platinum watch chain for his golden pocket watch, (an heirloom from his family), and the husband sells his prized pocket watch to buy his wife a set of decorative combs for her beautiful long hair.  The story reveals the love they had for each other–that they were willing to sacrifice something that they both valued–for the sake of the other.  Often it is in the midst of want and need–that love shines through.

I have my own story of a Christmas where I felt great want and need.  It was many years ago.  I was a young wife and mother, with just one child–a one year old.  My husband had started working as a carpenter for a construction company.  He was making $6 an hour.  I was a stay at home mom.  We were very, very poor.  And I was feeling the sting of being so poor.  

Both my husband and I love to give gifts to each other, and to others, and we could not afford very much.  I had been scrimping and saving to set aside some money to buy gifts.  I ended up buying my husband some carhartt overalls and a flannel shirt.  (He needed them desperately for work.)  I also got him a train engine.  (My husband has a hobby of collecting model trains–and every year for Christmas, he puts a Lionel train set around the Christmas tree.)

My husband got me an antique tea pot with sugar and creamer.  We bought our son a toy train set.  

Except for the Carharrt overalls–we probably paid $100 for all these gifts.  But it was not the cost that mattered–it was truly the thought.  I still treasure that teapot.  I still remember the thoughtfulness of the gift.  You see, when I got married, my mother gave me the tea set–the cups and saucers she had received as a wedding gift. 

So, when I opened the gift of the Tea Pot and sugar and creamer that matched that tea set, I was so, so touched at the thoughtfulness of the gift.  I will never forget that gift.  (Sometimes when there are so many gifts—it is hard to remember all of them—but when there is just one—and when that one is so thoughtful—it becomes elevated—never to be forgotten.)

This time of year—there are many gifts—there are lights and decorated trees and parades and joy!!  The whole world seems to be celebrating the greatest gift we have ever received—Jesus!!

At a time when there was great need, great want—Jesus came.   There is still great need and great want—and Jesus is still God’s gift to us—the One never to be forgotten—the One the whole world seems to be celebrating this time of year.

I hope and pray that if you are experiencing a Christmas of great need and great want—that you’ll see that God thought you were so important and so valuable—that He gave to you—a Gift beyond any price—the Gift of His Son.   I hope that this Gift will be elevated in our hearts above all others.

May We Be Encouraged!! Merry, Merry Christmas Everyone!!

The Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future

Published on by katiesencouragementforyou14 Comments

Every year, our family puts up our Christmas Tree.  We get out the boxes of decorations–they are in red tubs with green lids, and each ornament is nestled in its original boxes—I am bragging about this area of my organization, as it is the only area I can brag about. 🙂  We make hot cocoa, have some cookies, and decorate our tree.

I love decorating the tree.  We usually buy an ornament to commemorate a vacation we took, or a special trip we took and so decorating the tree is a walk down memory lane.  We talk about the trip or remember the people who gave us the baby ornament, or any ornament we put up on our tree. 

After Sean died, this usually wonderful tradition of decorating the tree became a tradition that led to grief.  Every ornament became a memory with his memory attached.  “Remember, we got this ornament when we took the trip to Florida and we went to Disney World?”   Then I would remember how Sean wanted to go to Florida to Disney World so badly.  There were T.V. shows on the Travel Channel highlighting the Disney Parks, and he would watch them over and over again.

“Mom, can we go to the Disney Parks?”  “Well, Sean, you can pray about anything, so you can pray that we go to the Disney Parks.”   In my mind, I didn’t know how this would ever happen, it seemed unlikely to say the least, but when my daughter told me all she wanted In the whole world was a baby sister, (she was 5 at the time), I told her the same thing—”well, you can pray about anything, so pray for God to give you a baby sister.”  I was thinking we could look into adoption.  Instead I found myself pregnant at the age of 45, giving birth to a baby girl at the age of 46. 

Sure enough, shortly after my son started praying to go to the Disney Parks, my sister-in-law called my husband and she wanted to plan a family trip with our families and their parents to go to the Disney Parks.  (Their parents had a time share that we used the points from to book timeshares in Orlando, and my sister-in-law knew the websites to get the best deals on the Disney tickets—and so we found ourselves down in Florida—in the Disney Parks!!)  We had a blast!!  Sean had a blast!!

 Looking at the ornaments–led to all those memories, which led to grief, but it also led to remembering the answered prayers as well. This helped us stand in the reality that God exists, and He loves us, He listens to us, He cares for us.    

It was very difficult to continue with this tradition of decorating the tree.  We celebrated our first Christmas without Sean a mere 3 months after we lost him.  We were still in a state of shock.  My husband and I thought we needed to continue with our traditions, that the children needed these things to bring the past into our present and our future.  Even though it felt like everything had changed, some things remained the same.   God’s love remained the same.  We have found that each year, there is more of a blessing in the remembering, than grief.  It has helped to bring Sean into our present and will help bring him into our future.

 Just writing this story, I am remembering my daughter praying for a baby sister, and God answered!!  God does not always answer these types of prayers—as my nieces who were only daughters will attest—but He did for my daughter.  Perhaps because He knew that she and all of us would need this baby in the days to come, (our baby was 6 years old when her brother died.) She would bring us God’s comfort and love in her hugs and kisses and declarations that, “Sean is in heaven, and we are going to heaven too, we will see him again.”

Christmas is celebrating that God left heaven and came down to earth in the form of a baby.  “Immanuel” means “God is with us.”   In John 1: 1,14, we find this concept of : The Word is God and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.  

In Romans 8:31, it says, “If God is for us, who is against us?”  In other words–it doesn’t matter who is against us, because God is so big and great, we are covered by Him.

Romans 8: 38, 39 also says– nothing can separate us from His love.

I am here to bear witness to these truths.  God is With Us.  God is For Us.  Nothing—not death nor life, nor any created thing can separate us from His love.   Not losing a child, or the grief that this loss brings, or any other problem in the entire world can separate us from His love.

If you are having trouble believing this, I want you to think about how much you love your children, and you are a mere human being. If you and I can love with such passion as imperfect human beings, imagine how a perfect, infinite being who considers us His children—loves us.  It is not so hard to imagine when we think of it in those terms—is it?

However, God’s thoughts are greater than my thoughts, and His ways are greater than my ways.  Sometimes, (ok—many times), I question God and what He is doing in my life.  I questioned Him many times for taking my son.  I have come to the realization that God is not upset with my questions, but sometimes His only answer is to wait on Him, and trust Him, even if I don’t know the answers, I can trust Him, I can trust His love, I can trust that He is for my family, He is for me.

You can trust that God is for you, He is for your family.  You can trust in His love.  He is “Immanuel”—God is with us—He is with us in our joy, in our grief and in our lives!!  So Be encouraged!!

**This post was originally posted 6 years ago–but I am still a witness to these truths. Merry Christmas Everyone!!

The Christmas International Tea

Published on by katiesencouragementforyou13 Comments

From the time I was really young, I’ve wanted to travel and meet others from other countries.  Have you ever had that same desire?  I love meeting and talking to others and finding out about their lives and their cultures.  However, I have not traveled beyond this continent.  So, when I found out that many Internationals travel to the US, and never get invited to an American’s home, I realized this was my opportunity to realize a dream.  So…11 years ago, when I sat in the library, at a table with a woman from the Middle East, we struck up a conversation.

We became friends, and she introduced me to her friends, and I introduced her to mine.  What sprang from that meeting was a group who began meeting once a month for a tea time.  We take turns meeting in each other’s homes.  We all bring a dish to pass.  And after getting some food and chatting, we ask a question, one question— (like: tell us your name, your country, and what brought you to this place?)– then we all go around and answer. 

People have come and gone from this group, as people have moved back to their countries, or moved to other places.  We stay connected through a couple of different social media groups.

Why am I telling you this?—perhaps because I’m hoping that there is a desire in you to reach out to others from other countries–and invite them into your home.   What an opportunity to be blessed, and to bless others.  I cannot tell you how much richer my life is, because of these people and I pray theirs is richer as well.  

I honestly think that as we spend time with people we think are so different from us, we find, that we are in fact, so similar.  We all have fears, we all desire to be loved and to love, we all love to laugh.  Perhaps, if we reach out to each other—and love each other—the world can become what God intended—one where we are connected to God, and we are connected to each other.

May We Be Encouraged!!

Enjoy the pictures from the last Tea!! 🙂  

Irritation

Published on by katiesencouragementforyou19 Comments

Hasn’t this fall been beautiful?  To me, it seems that this has been one of the most beautiful falls I’ve experienced in recent years.  The weather has been spectacular–full of sunny, warm days with mild breezes and the gorgeous colors of fall—the reds, yellows and oranges.

As we are celebrating Thanksgiving this week, these are some of the few things for which I’m thankful.   

On the flip side of gratitude, I’ve found myself getting irritated with others, more than I usually do.  And I thought I would share some things that the Lord has shared with me for dealing with these irritations—things besides complaining to my husband.

The Lord has shown me to:  Offer these annoyances up to Him, and to pray for the person.  Almost immediately, I experience the Lord’s presence and the Lord’s peace and the Lord’s pleasure.  So instead of allowing irritations  to fester in my heart, I am giving it to HIm.

It is really simple–I know.  But sometimes the simplest things can be the most profound and bring the most comfort.

So—I hope that if you face circumstances that annoy you, or people that annoy you—-you will remember the simple prayer the Lord gave me: (You don’t have to use my words–just share your heart with the Lord) I sometimes pray, “Father, thank you for this irritating situation, as it gives me a reason to stop focusing on this, and turn my eyes to You. I offer this situation up to You, and I pray for this person. You know this person’s needs. You know this person’s situation. Please help this person with their needs and their situation. Please help them to know that You are always with them. Please help them to know that You love them. Help them to see You in their life. I pray these things in Your name.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!