Quote – Encouragement for you!!

“God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin.”

What do you think about when you read that verse? Do you wonder, “What is sexual sin, and why is this important to God?”

When I was a freshman in college, one of my friends invited me to a film showing on my floor, called, “Maximum Sex”. The speaker was a man named Josh McDowell and he talked about the reasons to wait until marriage for sex. Now, my parents had talked to me about this, but no one else did.

I remember staying up with my roommate and a few others, talking until 5 in the morning about what this man said.

These were some of the key things I took away from this talk:

God wanted to protect me and provide for me.

*He wanted to protect my heart from being broken again.

*He wanted to protect me from diseases.

* He wanted to protect me from a pregnancy before I was ready and able to handle the responsibility of a child.

*He wanted to provide a husband I could trust.

*He wanted to provide a husband who had character.

* He wanted to provide a husband who would be a good father to our children and someone who would help me raise those children.

* God wanted to provide true intimacy and oneness for me and my husband.

(In reading over what I just wrote, I am struck anew with the fact that—that is exactly what God did provide for me through my husband of over 36 years.)

God loves us and wants the very best for each of us, and when we come to His Word and what His word is telling us, we need to read it with that in mind.

Jesus talks about this when He tells us that if anyone hears His words and listens and obeys, they are like a man who built his house on the rock, and when the rains came and the storms came, (rains and storms always come in life), the house stood firm. On the other hand, if one does not listen to Jesus, they are like a man who built his house on the sand, and when the rains and storms came that house was destroyed.

God does not want our house—our life to be destroyed—that is His motivation. He loves us—He wants the best for us. God wants the best for us. During this time if we haven’t been listening to Him, we can start. The God I know is a genius at rebuilding houses that have been destroyed – and putting them on a solid foundation. It is never too late to cast oneself into the Hands of a loving and forgiving God and ask for a new beginning.

May We Be Encouraged!!

This Christmas all my children and grandchildren were with me and my husband. When I say all–I also mean my son Sean, who died 12 years ago in September of 2013.

I’ve experienced this phenomenon before– where Sean’s presence is so strong at Christmas. I can hear his voice in my ear. I sense him all around the house. I’ve talked with others who have said goodbye to their loved ones, and they have had similar experiences. However, others have not had these experiences. I don’t know what it means. I have just been grateful to have had the experience.

On Christmas, as I was hugging my 3 year old granddaughter, she said out of the blue, “Uncle Sean”. I started crying in earnest. Later I told my granddaughter how glad I was that she said her Uncle Sean’s name, and that was a great gift to me to hear his name.

I have never really wanted to discuss these experiences too much, because we live in a culture where things have to be seen and touched and measured—for them to be real.

However, scripture tells us that we are living souls—that there is a part of each of us that cannot be seen or touched or measured—yet it is the realest and most alive part of each of us.

This is the season we celebrate God’s great gift to all of us–the gift of eternal life, the gift of forgiveness, the gift of a relationship with Him. He is the One in whom we live and have our being—the One who surrounds us and from where there is nowhere that we cannot go. This God gives breath to each of us. This God,emptied Himself, and became human and dwelt among us. This God is reconciling the world to Himself.

For some reason, this God allowed me to experience the presence of my son. Perhaps as a reminder that when we die, we still live on, and we will see each other again. We will be with each other, through all of eternity. Death will not win. Evil will not win. Love will triumph. Love will never fail. God will have the last Word.

May these thoughts bring peace to you, if you are grieving. May these thoughts bring hope to you if you are hopeless. May these thoughts bring you courage—if you need courage. May these thoughts bring love to you—for you are loved—with an everlasting love!!

May we be encouraged!!

I looked up every verse that had the word Praise in it or Praises. I was trying to get a handle on why God likes us to praise Him.

I know why I like to be praised. I like to be noticed for a job well done or a character quality I have. However, it matters who praises me. It means more coming from someone with whom I have a close relationship. In fact, being praised by someone can strengthen the relationship, and cause me to want to draw closer to that person.

Does God have the same reasons for liking to be praised?

I know God is pleased by my faith and by your faith–according to Hebrews 11:6.

Is praise an expression of faith?

I think it is.

When my son Sean died, we had a funeral and we sang, “I’ll praise you in the storm.” at his funeral, and “Who am I”. My husband and I found ourselves, holding hands and lifting them up to the Lord, and praising Him at our son’s funeral.

That was an act of faith, that in the midst of the worst thing that had ever happened to us, we were trusting God and we were going to praise Him in the midst of this terrible circumstance of our life.

Recently, we almost experienced another tragedy in our family, but this time, God intervened and saved a family member.

I have been thanking God profusely. Yet, the fact that calamity was averted has me feeling shaken and insecure and anxious about the future.

God has told me to write a blog about Praise. I think I know why.

Praise gets my eyes off myself–and onto Him. And when my eyes are on Him, I can walk through the raging seas.

Right now, so, so many of us are walking through the raging seas.

God isn’t telling us to Praise Him, because He is an egomaniac and a narcissist and He needs to be Praised by us.

No–He is telling us to Praise Him to strengthen our faith in Him. We take the time to Notice Who He is and What He has done for us–and we thank Him. We thank Him.

So let’s thank Him now:

Thank You Lord that You are with us as we walk through the raging seas. Thank You that You hold our hands and You won’t let us go. Thank You that we celebrate that You came into our world as a baby, and You bore our sorrows, and You experienced death for all of us—so that we would live with You throughout all of eternity. Thank You for being the lamb of God that takes away the sins of the world. Thank You that You have given us the gift of a relationship with You. Thank you for the great, great love You have for us. Thank You that You are the God of the heavens and the earth, the Creator of the universe, and yet You care for us. We praise You, Oh our God, our Lord, our King!! We praise You!!

Let Us Be Encouraged!!

I first published this blog last year–but the Lord asked me to publish it again, as many in our country are caught in a web of fear and anxiety right now. I have added a song called Psalm 23, (Still Waters) with the lyrics after the song.

[Verse 1]
Great Aunt Maurine said at a hundred and three
Write scripture on your heart for when you need it
Cause anxiety hates Psalm 23
So just say it to yourself ‘til you believe it
And I’m feeling like I’m needing it right now

[Chorus]
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want
He leads me by still waters ‘til my fears are gone
Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
O I know You are with me
My father, my friend
Your goodness and mercy will follow me all of my days
I know by Your still waters I’m safe

[Verse 2]
Lord I believe You can set mе at ease
Turn this broken piеce in me to peace and quiet
I know there’s power in Your word
So I’ll say it over and over til my soul’s reminded

[Chorus]
Oh The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want
He leads me by still waters ‘til my fears are gone
Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
O I know You are with me
My Father, my friend
Your goodness and mercy will follow me all of my days
I know by Your still waters I’m safe

[Bridge]Still waters run through
Any valley I could find
I’m laying fear down
Here at Heaven’s riverside
Your word has been true
In every season of my life
I believe, yes I believe that
Still waters run through
Any valley I could find
I’m laying fear down
Here at Heaven’s riverside
Your word has been true
In every season of my life
I believe, yes I believe

I grew up in the time period where the feminist movement was really promoting their message, that women are equal to men, and should be allowed to do the jobs men did, and get paid equally for those jobs.

I also heard messages that having children and mothering were not of value—because they stopped a woman from being “great” like a man. She could never be recognized as being valuable or significant if she was stuck at home caring for children. Being a stay at home mom was a sign that a male was dominating her and running the show–and her value was less than nothing. As a woman, she was imprisoned and no better than a slave if she stayed at home with her children.

Knowingly or unknowingly, I bought into those messages. I became really bitter and angry toward men. Then I met Jesus. I accepted the gift of a relationship He was offering me. Jesus died on the cross to save us, to save me. He came to love us, to love me.

He said things like, “…. if you want to be great, you must serve others.” Matthew 20:26

He turned my ideas around of what it meant to be great.

After I married and got pregnant, I read a book called, “A Mother’s Heart”—and it made me look at the role of mothering in a different way—not as something stopping me from being “great”, but as something very valuable. I started looking at investing in the lives of my children as one of the most valuable things I could do with my life.

However, I also looked at the job of mothering as a role that would make me valuable and significant. That was a lie –being a mother would not make me valuable or significant.

So what is this blog about? This blog is about unmasking the lies we believe and believing the truth instead— for instance these are lies—-Our greatness is found in what others think of us—we are valuable because of what we produce—or because of the jobs that we have—or because of the money that we make—or because —–???? Fill in the blank.

The lies are designed to keep us on the rollercoaster that never has an end. Designed to keep us playing the game, and never, ever, ever winning. Designed to keep us away from the One who came to save us, from the One who loves us, from the One who conferred upon us worth and value and significance and belonging and love—all because we are His children.

Being a parent is really important. God showed us that, when He adopted us as His children. Relationships are really important. God showed us that, when He gifted us with a relationship with Him–a relationship that has no end. But being a parent or having relationships is not where our value or significance or our belonging or our being loved lies either.

Wherever we go looking for what will make us great, or valuable, or significant or loved — we don’t have to search any further than our own backyard, (yes, this quote is directly from the Wizard of Oz, but it expresses the idea so perfectly.) If one is a child of God–one already has all those things–because our Dad makes it so. Our Heavenly Father is our Home–and there’s no place like Home.

May We Be Encouraged!!

Recently, I was asked to teach a lesson on Principle 7 for Celebrate Recovery, which states: Reserve a daily time with God for self examination, Bible readings and prayer in order to know God and His will for my life and to gain the power to follow His will.

The following are some excerpts from that talk:

I thought it was ironic that I was asked to give this lesson. Ironic because, after my son died, I did not have a quiet time for a long time. In fact, I wasn’t sure I even believed in God at times. Yet, I was aware of His presence, grieving with me. Before my son died, I was consistent in having quiet times, praying, fasting, reading scripture and journaling. . After Sean died, I did not journal for at least a year and my journaling was very spotty even after that. Why, you might ask?

Well, because of how God is. Being with Him brings comfort, but it also can bring more pain.

Hebrews 4:12 says: For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.

God and His Word have power. They have the power to change our lives. Let’s be honest–change can hurt. Change is uncomfortable. And we are a people who are already suffering. We want relief from our suffering. We turn to substances, or habits, or anything to get that relief.

God often has us face the pain, under His guidance and counsel—to find our relief in Him. This is a paraphrase of Matthew 11:28-30. “Come to Me. Get away with Me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with Me and work with Me–watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with Me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly”

My view of God affects if I want to spend time with Him or not. If I think He is disappointed in me, I don’t want to spend time with Him. That’s just more pain. It helps me to look at Jesus to get a proper view of God. In fact sometimes I just hang out in the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John–so I can ‘see’ Jesus for who He really is. He is gentle and meek of heart–and He longs to draw us close to Him as a Hen draws her chicks under her wings. Jesus loves us, and Jesus weeps for us, and Jesus died for us.

I go to a biblical counselor, and she will often tell me, “God’s love and delight in us in Christ is such that we can come anytime and tell Him we’ve messed up. We can actually thank Him for forgiveness (instead of pleading for it) because it has already been provided through the cross. He says, “Come here. Climb up on my lap and I will remind you that you are washed clean and forgiven; and I love you, I love you, I love you. Now go play, and when you mess up again, come tell me, and I will remind you that you are washed clean by the blood of Jesus; you are completely forgiven, and I love you. Now go play…”

That was the introduction of my talk, the body of the talk was the practical application of the lesson, and the following is the conclusion of the talk:

Some of you may be wondering how I dealt with my crisis and loss of faith after my son died. I’ll tell you, I went back to what I knew was true. The Apostle Paul wrote in 1 Cor. 15:14: And if Christ has not been raised, then all our preaching is useless, and your faith is useless.

I started looking at the evidence for the resurrection of Jesus Christ. Josh McDowell, a former atheist, looked at the evidence for the resurrection–and became a Christian. He wrote Evidence that Demands a Verdict, and More than a carpenter. I first read these books in college–when I was questioning my beliefs at that time.

You see my feelings were going haywire, and telling me all kinds of different things. I knew enough to know that Faith is not based on feelings. Faith is a choice we make to trust God, and take Him at His Word. Once I confirmed my faith based on Jesus’ death and resurrection, I looked at what Jesus said. In Matt. 24:35 Jesus says, “Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will not pass away.”

I started to pray Prayers like: Lord, based on the circumstances of my life, I don’t “feel” that You love me, but Your word says that You love me, and Your word is truer than my feelings. Therefore I choose to believe that You love me.”

There are still many days that I don’t want to spend time with the Lord–I still want to avoid the emotional pain that it might bring. When those times happen—it helps to look at the truth of who God is, and how He demonstrated His love for me, by sending Jesus to die on the cross for me.

May We Be Encouraged!!

Have you ever had a song stick in your brain? I have had this happen many, many times. One of the most memorable times was when we were in the hospital with Sean. I kept hearing this song, in my mind, but I couldn’t remember all the words, I could just remember the tune, and some of the words. I kept singing it to myself over and over again.

The song was, “Who Am I” by Casting Crowns. When we were preparing for Sean’s funeral, I asked my friends who were musicians if we could sing this song during the funeral. They told me we could.

We sang this song again at the gravesite. It was at this time that my mother-in-law took a call and found out that her husband of 55 years was dead. As she was preparing for my father-in-law’s funeral, she wanted to have this song at his funeral, but the musicians she had did not know the song, and couldn’t play it.

Today is the 4th anniversary of my mother-in-law going home to be with the Lord. I am sharing this song again in memory of her. We miss her and all our loved ones who are with the Lord, and look forward to seeing them again. Listen to this song, and marvel at the wonder that the Lord of all the earth cares for us and calls us His own.

Who Am I

Song by Casting Crowns

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth would care to know my name?
Would care to feel my hurt?
Who am I, that the bright and morning star would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart?

Not because of who I am
But because of what you’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done
But because of who you are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean (ocean)
A vapor in the wind
Still you hear me when I’m calling
Lord, you catch me when I’m falling
And you’ve told me who I am
I am yours, I am yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin would look on me with love
And watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me?

Not because of who I am
But because of what you’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done
But because of who you are

I am yours
I am yours

Whom shall I fear?
Whom shall I fear?
‘Cause I am yours
I am yours

May We Be Encouraged!!

I looked up every verse that had the word Praise in it or Praises. I was trying to get a handle on why God likes us to praise Him.

Does God have the same reasons for liking to be praised?

I know God is pleased by my faith and by your faith–according to Hebrews 11:6.

Is praise an expression of faith?

I think it is.

Recently, we almost experienced another tragedy in our family, but this time, God intervened and saved a family member.

I have been thanking God profusely. Yet, the fact that calamity was averted has me feeling shaken and insecure and anxious about the future.

God has told me to write a blog about Praise. I think I know why.

Praise gets my eyes off myself–and onto Him. And when my eyes are on Him, I can walk through the raging seas.

Right now, so, so many of us are walking through the raging seas.

God isn’t telling us to Praise Him, because He is an egomaniac and a narcissist and He needs to be Praised by us.

No–He is telling us to Praise Him to strengthen our faith in Him. We take the time to Notice Who He is and What He has done for us–and we thank Him. We thank Him.

So let’s thank Him now:

Let Us Be Encouraged!!

Today, I polished the silver. This is one of the things I do before I decorate for Christmas. One of my favorite Christmas gifts from years ago is a silver tea set from my late mother-in-law. I had not asked for one, but as soon as I opened it, I imagined many tea parties in which this tea set would grace the center stage.

I have had the privilege and honor of hosting many tea parties over the years. They have been times of sweet, sweet times with other women. They are a reminder to me of what the Lord can do.

When I first moved to town, I was asked to join with 3 other women and have a bible study. We were all young moms with young children. We didn’t have a plan for what to do with our children during the study, and so we were constantly interrupted by them.

A few years later, I decided to start another mom’s bible study. I saw that moms in my area needed a place to be encouraged in their roles as moms. I talked with my husband and asked if we could hire one of the college girls we knew to watch the kids during the bible study time. I would ask the other moms to chip in to pay for the sitter, but knew that my husband and I would make up the difference for whatever gap there might be.

I also decided to train the other women who came to lead the bible study—that way, they could start and lead their own studies. (I had been on staff with a Christian ministry–and this was one of the things I did as part of my job–lead bible studies and train others to lead studies.)

The study met in my house for a few months. Then two of the women who came decided to take what they learned and start a mom’s bible study at their church. They hired a babysitter to watch the kids–and so it began.

That bible study is still going strong–28 years later–at what is now my church. (I had the honor of being involved in leadership at this bible study–and hosting some tea parties for the moms who came.) This is what the Lord can do—and only what the Lord can do. This bible study is one of the ministries of the church–so they provide childcare, so that women can come and be ministered to.

It is good for me to look back at these types of examples—so when I come to huge obstacles of faith–I see that it is not my faith in myself and my abilities—it is always and always will be God who overcomes, God who does the miracles–God who moves the mountains.

Recently—my family has been enduring huge, huge trials and tribulations. A beloved member of my extended family is in the hospital, in critical condition, needing God’s healing touch as gifted Doctors and Nurses seek to help him with their skills.

Another family member was literally brought back to life by the Lord, through a series of miracles.

A few family members have had difficult times bringing precious babies into the world. Yet–they did–and we have precious, precious babies in our family now!!

Through all these things, we have seen and experienced the goodness and compassion of the Lord. How He loves us! He loves us, when we can’t go one more step. He loves us when we are bereft. He loves us, when we are afraid. He loves us when we are waiting for His answers. He simply loves us. Oh how He loves you and me.

May We Be Encouraged!!

11 and a 1/2 years ago I was having a conversation with my son Sean. I was really angry with a person. This person was hurting other people with their actions, and I was so angry about their behavior.

Sean turned to me and said, “You know mom, Jesus went to the cross to pay for all our sins–I don’t think He thinks this person’s sin is worse than yours or mine—it still required His death to pay for it.”

I said to Sean, “No, this person’s sin is worse than mine, as the consequences for their sin are way more devastating.”

Sean replied, “ Perhaps on earth, the consequences are more devastating, but in Heaven—the payment for all our sins was the same—Jesus’ death. Therefore in God’s eyes, you are not better than this person, as you both need Jesus to deal with your sin.”

“Mom—think about it. Jesus went to the cross to pay for these sins. This person is not the only one who needs to repent of their sin.”

I did not want to hear my son’s words. I wanted to hang onto my anger, and my justification for my anger. I wanted to stay in denial about my own sin, and point my finger at someone else about their sin.

In fact, I don’t think I ever did admit at that time that Sean was right, and that God Himself was speaking through my son to me about my anger.

However, recently, I’ve thought about that conversation in the context of a Bible Study I’ve done on the subject of Denial. I am doing this Bible Study through Celebrate Recovery.

This study has really helped me to see the areas in my own life that I’ve been hurt, and how I use anger to protect me from further hurt. In reality, anger and the control I think I have through anger–only makes the hurt last longer. The walls I put up are to keep God and people out. (Of course, nothing can separate me from God‘s love.)

Admitting the hurt to God and to others and my response to the hurt—brings the situation into the light—where God can bring healing. I have heard it said that, “We are only as sick as our secrets.” I have found out that this is true, keeping secrets keeps me sick.

“God is light: in Him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with Him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, His Son, purifies us from all sin. “ 1 John 1:5-7

“Stop lying to each other, tell the truth, for we are parts of each other and when we lie to each other, we are hurting ourselves.” Ephesians 4: 25

To anyone longing for a group where you can receive love and acceptance and tools to help you heal, as you tell the truth about your life, I recommend looking into a Celebrate Recovery Group.

And as always—May We Be Encouraged!!

Many years ago, my husband and I took our young family to the county fair. Sean was just a baby, and he was in a heavy-duty baby backpack. We decided to have some lunch and entered the 4-H building–which was in a metal building with a cement floor and had many, many picnic tables lined up in rows. I had taken the backpack from my husband and was carrying the backpack with Sean in it–in front of me– through a row of some picnic tables. I caught my foot in the circular leg sticking out of the side of the picnic table, and I fell on top of the backpack, which hit the cement floor before I fell on it, with my baby son Sean, inside the backpack.

Before I could move, my husband, along with every medical person in the building, descended upon Sean and me. My husband checked Sean over. His eyes were tracking. He didn’t even have a scratch on him. He was fine. Absolutely fine.

My leg was banged up and bleeding. I was shaken and scared. Sean was gurgling and jabbering to all the medical personnel surrounding him. I still don’t understand how he survived that crash. As I prayed about the situation, I had a sense of God telling me that He had my child in His Hands.

Years later, my oldest son went to Australia on a mission trip. He got bit by a poisonous spider. He had to be taken to the hospital, for them to treat him. The very same day this happened, we had to take our second son to the hospital in our town to be treated for an emergency.

Once again, the Holy Spirit spoke to me and told me that my children were in His Hands whether they be thousands of miles away from me or in the same room with me.

My son Sean did not survive an accident when he was 16. Many, many times over the past 10 years the Lord has told me, “Your child is in My Hands.”

There are many parents grieving for their babies now in war torn countries. I have been praying for them. I have been praying for them all. Once again, the whisper of the Lord says, “Their children are in My Hands.”

In the midst of all the evil, the hatred and the grief—the goodness and the love of our Lord —brings————Peace.

May We Be Encouraged.

Photo taken by friend of Mediterranean Sea.